Finding the first school for your child

The biggest question in front of a new set of parents, especially the first timers is, "how do I find the best school for the apple of my eye?" if we are lucky, we stumble upon the best school, if not.........
The whole search can bear fruit if we go about it in a systematic way. This article is specially dedicated to the first time parents looking for THAT school for their toddler.
Some things that need to be kept in mind is-{any mention of HE is purely for convenience}:
Your 3 year old is not equipped by nature to write reams of homework.
He needs the freedom to run about and get to do a lot of physical work for himself, and not served by others.
He needs to be in a place where he is loved and not that he is a source of income.
Keeping the above things in mind [I know you want to add many more, but this will do for now] lets look for a checklist to find the right school for your child.
Location: Preferably look for school in your own locality. It should be near the home (or the office if both the parents are working). Also it saves the child having to travel long distance and in case of emergency situations, the parents can reach the school fast.
Kind of School: Both the parents need to come to a consensus regarding the kind of school they want for their child. Whether a playschool, a Montessori school, a traditional school or one of many schools that have taken up the challenges of the new world and are trying new methods of education (you both too need to believe in it before sending your tiny tot there) – it can be anything but the parents have to be comfortable with the method and the intended result of that method. Once you decide on a method be ready to go with the flow, ask questions but if you are getting grave doubts about the method, pull the child out.
Teacher: Some of the qualities to look out in the teachers are as:
1. A ready smile and a willingness to interact with the parents to put them at ease with regard to the method used in the school.
2. Looks the child in the eye while talking to him.
3. Has a pleasant expression on her face. Knowing good English is an advantage, but interest in the child counts for more than the language.
4. Whatever the way with the adults, she needs to be attentive and pleasant with the child.
Place: The following criteria should be kept in mind when looking for a place: 1. The place is full of happy chatter (beware of an absolutely silent preschool) of physically active children with a smile on their face. 2. Preferably large and airy. In this era of space crunch, it may not be possible, so if other criteria are being met, we can make an exception (in that case do make time to take the child out to play in the evening) 3.The children should have space to move around freely and should not look packed in cramped for space. 4.Neat and clean apparatus- lots of them and all intact. They should not be dirty, shabby, incomplete sets or broken. 5. Clean rooms and furniture - The ayah also must be clean and must have a pleasing way with the children. 6. Look out if you can observe potentially dangerous things left lying around. 7. A secure/child proof latch on the main gate. 8. Check out the toilets used by the children. Is it neat and clean and has fixtures that can be operated independently by the child? 9. Does the teacher let the children go home with whoever comes to pick them up, or insist on a regular authorized person to so? The stricter they are about it, the better it is for the safety of your child. Generally: 1. In looking for all these things, do not forget the three R's (good old fashioned Reading, wRiting and aRithmetics). Is the child's academics being taken care of in a child friendly way, or are the children being pushed into it- do take care, if he develops an aversion to studies now, you will have a struggle on your hands later on. If they are not learning anything, again it is a problem. The best thing to do is to talk to like minded people with children of the same age and find out what is the best for your child and you. 2. Transparency: If the school welcomes parents for observation and is open to interaction with parents (by appointment) it indicates that they are confident of and are walking the talk. 3. I am not talking of fees as it is a subjective matter, but do be aware if they are delivering what they are charging for.
Above are some of the indicators that you can look for while selecting the school for your child. In all likelihood, you may not be able to find a school that fits all these criteria, but still choose what is the best among the school closest to your ideal. Feeling good about a place is a highly unscientific method, but may often work. Just remember, an AC and luxurious surroundings where your child is pampered and everything done for him is not in the best interest of your child just now when he needs to be active around various things and trying out new things. A child friendly and open surrounding with space for exploring and moving about independently (with attention to the academic growth too) is the need of your child at this moment. How to find this school?
The best bet will be word of mouth. Look at the school going children in your neighborhoods. Talk to the parents of these children, especially if the children look happy and cheerful. Also go around to the school when it is just getting over. Observing the children coming out [whether they come out with a smile and a skip or with a long face and dragging feet. It will give you the picture]. Internet is a good source for names and addresses, but I feel that you owe it to your child to check out if they are following all that has been put up on the web site.

Tips for Breastfeeding Twin/Triplets

It can be a shock to learn that you are pregnant with twins. Suddenly many of your expectations, plans, and former decisions are changed. Your decision to breastfeed, however, does not have to change. Human milk is especially important for twins, who are often small at birth and need all the health advantages human milk provides. And breastfeeding can help you create that special and necessary bond with both babies. Many mothers have nursed their twins with wonderful results; you can enjoy nurturing your babies in this special way, too!
Getting Started
Nursing early and often is the best way to get a good start breastfeeding. However, if you or your babies have a health problem that necessitates separation, this doesn't mean you have to give up the idea of breastfeeding.
If it is necessary to pump your milk because one or both babies cannot nurse, use a full-size automatic electric pump on both breasts every two to three hours during the day and at least once during the night.
Milk supply is regulated by the amount of sucking (or pumping) that stimulates the breasts. That's why mothers of twins almost always produce enough milk for both babies.
Coordinating Nursing
Once the twins are healthy and at home, most mothers of twins find it easiest to nurse both at once. Use pillows to support the babies so your hands are free to help each one latch on correctly.
It's a good idea to switch babies from one side to the other at alternate feedings. For example, Baby A takes the left breast at 7 am and Baby B takes the right breast. At the next feeding, Baby B takes the left breast and Baby A takes the right breast.
Night Nursings
Night nursing will be easier if you can learn to nurse lying down. One position that allows simultaneous nursing of twins lying down is to lie nearly flat on your back with one baby lying next to you, his head at your breast and his feet pulled in close to your body. Let the second baby lie across your body, head at your breast and feet tucked in under the other baby's knees.
Mothering the Mother
Above all, a mother of twins needs to take good care of herself, eating well-balanced meals and drinking to thirst. Get as much rest as possible by sleeping whenever the babies sleep. Accept all offers of help with meals, laundry, and older siblings.
Ambivalent Feelings
Before, during, and after the birth, some mothers of twins have mixed emotions about their "double blessings." Unfortunately, they are often isolated from others because of bed rest or fatigue, or their negative feelings are not understood by those around them. These feelings are a normal reaction to a very stressful situation and should not be ignored or discounted. It often helps to talk to another mother of twins.

Help!
Mothers of twins need help if they are to survive the first year. This may sound dramatic, but it is true. The biggest problems for mothers of twins are getting enough sleep, keeping up with minimal housework, finding outlets for negative feelings, and isolation. The help and support of friends, relatives, and spouses can mean the difference between making it and falling apart for a new mother of twins.
Many times people want to help, but they don't know what to do. Friends or family members who try to help can actually make things worse. Here is a short list of tips for anyone who wants to help a mother of twins.
What You Can Do
Bring food when you visit.
Change the babies.
Give her a back rub or a foot massage while she nurses the babies.
Bring her water or juice.
Watch the babies while she sleeps.
If a baby needs to nurse in the middle of the night, change him, and then bring him to the mother while she is in bed. When the next baby wakes up, switch them.
Watch the babies while she takes a 15 minute walk or a bubble bath.
Listen if she is feeling scared, tired, or overwhelmed.
Hold her if she needs to cry.
Do laundry, fold the clothes, and put them away in the dresser.
Prepare lunch or dinner and serve it to her.
Tell her you love her.
Bring over current magazines, catalogues, or video tapes.
Help her find another mother of twins to talk to.
Clean up the kitchen, do dishes, vacuum, pick up.
Tell her what a good job she's doing with her babies.
Other Things to Keep in Mind
When you visit, help the mother feel relaxed; don't expect to be entertained.
She needs support and encouragement; don't give advice when she complains or seems tired.
The mother may be feeling vulnerable; do not undermine her confidence by asking negative questions like, "Are you sure those babies are getting enough to eat?" or "Why aren't they sleeping through the night yet?"
Concentrate on "mothering the mother" and helping with household chores rather than trying to take over the care of the babies.
A mother of twins needs extra help at least throughout the first year; don't disappear after three months.
What if there is no help?
If the mother of twins is living far away from family and friends, or they are working during the day, hiring a mother's helper may be the answer. Even if the cost is high, the mother's physical and emotional well-being is worth it. Some mothers have hired high school students to help after school. Some churches or community groups provide volunteer mother's helpers for mothers of twins. Retirees or stay-at-home mothers with school age children may also be willing to work for a lower wage

Home Remedy for Thumb Sucking

Persistent thumb sucking in older children may be a symptom of emotional distress. He or she may be plagued by feelings of sadness or anxiety, and thumb sucking may continue to be a form of self comfort. If this sounds like your child, insisting that he or she stop thumb sucking will only make matters worse. Instead, try to discover the source of your child's sadness or anxiety.Parents often begin to worry about a child if he or she continues thumb sucking past age four or five. While it's perfectly normal to be concerned that the child's habit reflects poorly on your parenting skills, it's counterproductive to let your son or daughter know how upset you are or use wrongheaded measures to make the child stop thumb sucking. But what are the potential consequences if your child does not quit by this age, as most do? Thumb sucking can lead to problems if it persists after permanent teeth have come in. The constant sucking can cause mal-alignment of teeth and affect the proper growth of the mouth. The severity of the problem seems to depend on a child's individual sucking style: Kids who simply rest their thumbs on their tongues tend to have fewer problems than children who suck vigorously.As a child reaches school age, thumb sucking could pose social problems. In one study, first-graders were shown photos of two seven-year-old kids. In one set of photos, the children were sucking their thumbs, in the second set they were not. The first-graders rated children in the thumb-sucking pose as less intelligent, happy, attractive, and desirable as friends. Psychologists say thumb suckers are frequent targets of teasing.Other potential problems for children who suck their thumbs chronically include infections of the thumbnail, thumb malformation, and the possibility of poisoning (if a child touches a toxic substance before inserting a thumb in the mouth).There are a variety of dental devices that can be used to help a child stop thumb sucking, but only use one if the child accepts it. Forcing a child to use such a device can damage a child's psyche, which can be harder to fix than misaligned teeth.Thumbing sucking can be a vexing problem for parents. Understanding the origins , as well as a strategy for breaking your child of the habit, can give you peace of mind.
It was cute when she was a baby, but now that your child has reached kindergarten age, you're starting to worry about her having her thumb in her mouth all the time. You feel embarrassed when you're out in public with her (What will the neighbors think?) and are concerned about what her peers will say in school.
You're not alone: Pediatricians estimate that somewhere in the neighborhood of 18 percent of children between the ages of two and six suck their thumbs. Why do they start? Various explanations have been suggested, but most experts agree that thumb sucking calms and comforts the child.
It has been observed that where children generally begin to spend their time physically separate from their mothers at a very early age. Thumb sucking is uncommon in cultures where mothers tend to hold their babies for long periods or otherwise keep them in physical contact with them in early years.
If there's one message that pediatricians have about thumb sucking, it's this: The best way to get a child to continue thumb sucking is to tell him or her to stop. A better strategy is to wait until the child finds an incentive to quit the behavior, such as being teased at school about thumb sucking, and let him or her bring it up. Experts say that addressing the problem when the child is ready is more likely to be successful than attacking it head on and forcing him or her to quit.
Use a reward system. Pediatricians sometimes recommend a game-playing, reward-based system for helping kids stop sucking their thumbs. Try buying a calendar and placing it on the refrigerator. For each day you don't see the child sucking his or her thumb, you can put a smiley-face sticker on the day. At the end of a set period of time, say a month, you can offer a modest reward, such as a toy or dinner at the child's favorite restaurant.
Try ordeal therapy. How about trying a little reverse psychology? Point out to a thumb-sucking child that he or she isn't being fair to the other fingers -- so why not suck them, too? Give the child a timer and explain that it's important to suck all fingers for the same duration. Often, the child will grow so tired of the process that they quit thumb sucking altogether. The only problem with this type of approach is that kids are likely to see through it when it comes from a parent (they know the parent really wants them to stop altogether). If you suspect that this will be the case, a pediatrician or close friend of the family may be able to help.
Offer the child the option of thumb sucking in private. Consider your efforts a success if the child quits thumb sucking in front of you or in public. Don't worry, the relatively brief time a child can spend sucking on a thumb in private won't be long enough to cause other problems.
Never use negative reinforcement. If the child has a slip, it may be destructive to use a negative reward, such as placing a sad-faced sticker on a calendar date. Failure has a nasty way of perpetuating itself.
Try "reminder fluid." Although some doctors see it as cruel, others recommend the use of bad-tasting fluids that are put on the thumb to keep the child from putting it in his or her mouth. However, don't use this method as a punishment. Rather, stress the positive by telling the child that the fluid will help by serving as a reminder of his or her goal. As an alternative, parents can place a glove or mitten on the child's hand as a reminder to keep the thumb out of the mouth.
Start with the easy stuff, then move on. First, you might suggest that the child stop thumb sucking while in public, or some other time when he or she is most likely to comply. Then you can move on to the times when the habit is most ingrained, such as bedtime. You may want to double rewards if the child doesn't suck his or her thumb during the more challenging times.
Don't yell. Although you may feel frustrated when your child slides back into his or her thumb-sucking behavior, don't punish or yell at the child. You will only make him or her nervous and upset, which will probably lead to more thumb sucking.
Wait it out. You know what happens to most kids who suck their thumbs at four, five, or even six years of age? They stop. Parents often notice that children engage in the habit a bit less with each passing year, or perhaps only suck their thumbs at certain times, such as when they're tired or watching television. Pediatricians say that many children give up thumb sucking altogether by age six or seven because of peer pressure -- ribbing from friends and schoolmates shames them into stopping.